i shall learn to be grateful

dear bloggie,,

i shall learn how to be grateful with everything i have.i must not take everything for granted.i dont know why suddenly on earth i think like that but suddenly i feel i just need to be grateful with everything i have.

i realized that i always take everything for granted like err..i dont know.

like meiyi for example.i shall appreciate her.i suddenly realized that she has done alot good to me while i always be an obnoxious sister to her.she treat me very well and she always bother to know about my life or any update in my life.i never bother pun to ask her.well i did ask her about her examination and she answered me back why do i want to know.besides that, i dont know what else to ask her.haha.kakak yang tak guna.well, there is like a gap between us.i dont like tell her everything in my life like how i used to before.even my crush now pun she also dont know padahal last time she know every single thing about tim.

i shall appreciate mummy and everything she has done for me.i suddenly feel that mummy sometimes always give me everything what i wanted.well not everything la but almost everything.i also feel thankful that she never slap my face whenever i shouted or being rude to her.yea i know im anak yang sangat tak guna.sometimes i feel that she doesnt deserve a daughter like me.she deserve a way much better,obedient and smarter daughter.she like done lots of things for me but what i gave her only shit.i shall start to study hard and forced myself to study hard and stop asking her money to shop just for my own satisfaction.suka hati only want to spend the money like that.think that im the only child is it?orang kerja susah susah suka suka hati wana go shop and spend the money like that just because hati tak tenang if i didnt get that whatever stuff.i should stop being selfish.mummy has dedicated her whole life just to take care of me so why dont i make her pengorbanan berbaloi.so i should start being a good, obedient and nerdy child yang belajar 24/7.

i shall appreciate all the friends im having.i have to stop being a useless friend and selfish.friends are very important in my life.i cant live without them.who am i going to crap with if i dont have any friends.i realised that im always rude to my friend or scolded for no reason.sometimes, i also treat them badly just because im not in the good mood or whatever is bothering me.see.i take all my friends for granted.when they are gone kan dont only baru start wana cry sampai mati.when they are by my side, i treat them like shit.so i shall treasure everyone of them.

i should be thankful that im in uniten studying whatever i want now.im the one who wanted to go to uniten to study.not like got anyone force me or what.i have made my choice so stop being a biatch thinking of quiting study or whatever am i planning to do.got alot people want to study also cannot.sometimes the auntie at coe foodcourt make me realised that i should be grateful that i can study at uniten.i see the way she look at us like very envy with us that we get to study and enjoy life as a university student.so i shall appreciate this chance or whatever thing.i shall be grateful that im allowed to study civil engineering and pursue what i want to be walaupun i interested more in fashion journalism.HAHA.yea i know whoever reading this will be laughing their ass off.so, i should stop second guess myself and focus on what i want to achieve and appreciate everything that im having right now and work harder for what i want.

i think i shall appreciate this first sem.actually there is nothing much pun need to study.subjects that im taking are only bi, computing skill class, calculus, physics and physics's lab.so nothing much can.i just need to focus more on calculus and physics.like the other three dont need to bother also never mind.just concentrate in the class on what the lecturer is teaching that's all.like got nothing much pun.so why am i cry sampai nak mati like this sem is very hard la.stupid la me.kadang kadang tak tahu nak bersyukur la.next sem kan got chemistry.so if want to get high gpa, this sem i shall get it.its easy la actually if i stop being a lazy biatch.

see, i always take everything for granted and never ever really try to look at other point of view.if i look at different view, my life will so much happier and easier.maybe now, i also wont be spending time posting this.so i just need to realize that actually my life dah cukup senang.im like the only one yang tak sedar and tak tahu belajar menghargai.thats whyalways blame my own fate asking god why is it my life like this la?blabla la.stupid psychotic biatch me.since the first sem is like quite easy, and its going to end in a month and two weeks more, so start working my ass off to get good result la instead of sulking here and asking why am i stupid la this and that la.if i learn how to appreciate everything in my life, the chances for me to get moody, angry or stress in my life is like 0.000099%.then i also will have less pergolakan jiwa.so stop crapping too much la.everyone get what am i trying to say already la.i must be grateful with everything i have and must not take everything for granted.so, the end.

bye.before i repeat again what am i trying to say.

*end*