i want this so badly !!!!

dear bloggie,,

its ford mustang 1966 model.i want this so badly !! i wonder is this car still exist or not.my dream car ; ford mustang.but all the new model like no more longer look classic and classy.it looks like for people to show off that they are rich people who afford ford mustang.i want this and only this !!

i shall learn to be grateful

dear bloggie,,

i shall learn how to be grateful with everything i have.i must not take everything for granted.i dont know why suddenly on earth i think like that but suddenly i feel i just need to be grateful with everything i have.

i realized that i always take everything for granted like err..i dont know.

like meiyi for example.i shall appreciate her.i suddenly realized that she has done alot good to me while i always be an obnoxious sister to her.she treat me very well and she always bother to know about my life or any update in my life.i never bother pun to ask her.well i did ask her about her examination and she answered me back why do i want to know.besides that, i dont know what else to ask her.haha.kakak yang tak guna.well, there is like a gap between us.i dont like tell her everything in my life like how i used to before.even my crush now pun she also dont know padahal last time she know every single thing about tim.

i shall appreciate mummy and everything she has done for me.i suddenly feel that mummy sometimes always give me everything what i wanted.well not everything la but almost everything.i also feel thankful that she never slap my face whenever i shouted or being rude to her.yea i know im anak yang sangat tak guna.sometimes i feel that she doesnt deserve a daughter like me.she deserve a way much better,obedient and smarter daughter.she like done lots of things for me but what i gave her only shit.i shall start to study hard and forced myself to study hard and stop asking her money to shop just for my own satisfaction.suka hati only want to spend the money like that.think that im the only child is it?orang kerja susah susah suka suka hati wana go shop and spend the money like that just because hati tak tenang if i didnt get that whatever stuff.i should stop being selfish.mummy has dedicated her whole life just to take care of me so why dont i make her pengorbanan berbaloi.so i should start being a good, obedient and nerdy child yang belajar 24/7.

i shall appreciate all the friends im having.i have to stop being a useless friend and selfish.friends are very important in my life.i cant live without them.who am i going to crap with if i dont have any friends.i realised that im always rude to my friend or scolded for no reason.sometimes, i also treat them badly just because im not in the good mood or whatever is bothering me.see.i take all my friends for granted.when they are gone kan dont only baru start wana cry sampai mati.when they are by my side, i treat them like shit.so i shall treasure everyone of them.

i should be thankful that im in uniten studying whatever i want now.im the one who wanted to go to uniten to study.not like got anyone force me or what.i have made my choice so stop being a biatch thinking of quiting study or whatever am i planning to do.got alot people want to study also cannot.sometimes the auntie at coe foodcourt make me realised that i should be grateful that i can study at uniten.i see the way she look at us like very envy with us that we get to study and enjoy life as a university student.so i shall appreciate this chance or whatever thing.i shall be grateful that im allowed to study civil engineering and pursue what i want to be walaupun i interested more in fashion journalism.HAHA.yea i know whoever reading this will be laughing their ass off.so, i should stop second guess myself and focus on what i want to achieve and appreciate everything that im having right now and work harder for what i want.

i think i shall appreciate this first sem.actually there is nothing much pun need to study.subjects that im taking are only bi, computing skill class, calculus, physics and physics's lab.so nothing much can.i just need to focus more on calculus and physics.like the other three dont need to bother also never mind.just concentrate in the class on what the lecturer is teaching that's all.like got nothing much pun.so why am i cry sampai nak mati like this sem is very hard la.stupid la me.kadang kadang tak tahu nak bersyukur la.next sem kan got chemistry.so if want to get high gpa, this sem i shall get it.its easy la actually if i stop being a lazy biatch.

see, i always take everything for granted and never ever really try to look at other point of view.if i look at different view, my life will so much happier and easier.maybe now, i also wont be spending time posting this.so i just need to realize that actually my life dah cukup senang.im like the only one yang tak sedar and tak tahu belajar menghargai.thats whyalways blame my own fate asking god why is it my life like this la?blabla la.stupid psychotic biatch me.since the first sem is like quite easy, and its going to end in a month and two weeks more, so start working my ass off to get good result la instead of sulking here and asking why am i stupid la this and that la.if i learn how to appreciate everything in my life, the chances for me to get moody, angry or stress in my life is like 0.000099%.then i also will have less pergolakan jiwa.so stop crapping too much la.everyone get what am i trying to say already la.i must be grateful with everything i have and must not take everything for granted.so, the end.

bye.before i repeat again what am i trying to say.

*end*

!!@#@#$%^&*(())&^&$

dear bloggie,,

i just dye my hair red in color.well,its not exactly red.something like bree van de kamp but brownish a bit.and not me the one who choose the color but big sis.at first im not sure want to dye or not because the color like very auntie-ish but somehow i just cross my finger and dye.it turn out to be nice.for me la. i like it.i dont know what the other will think when they see my hair and i tak kisah pun!.meiyi also said my hair nice but mummy said i look like a lala mui.well,its not that gold infact its not gold at all la.she always like that wan.when people dye hair no matter what color she will say that people look like a lala mui.what la.

currently, im strugling with my calculus study.i dont know why but i feel like im 10 times dumber compared to my intelligence last time.not that i want to show off that im smart or what but seriously i feel that im 10 time dumber.i dont know what had make me dumber and i wonder what.like last time when study add maths for the first time memang like very hard but not hard like this calculus.i get to understand and do add maths like after study it for ten times but with this calculus like no matter how many time i study it i will not get to understand and do it all.seriously.how la.

haiyo, next next friday, 11 09 09 got calculus test 2.like in two weeks more and i really need to get study right now because i really cannot understand any single crap in chapter two.stupid la me.why am i so stupid?if want to be stupid dont la choose this important moment to be stupid. haiyo !

in a month and two weeks more, there will be final exam.then break for two weeks then sem 2 start.haih.how come time pass like so fast wan.12 october will be final exam.so scary.thats mean i got a month and two weeks more to prepare.atleast its a good start right that i realize bout it early.

haih.time really pass that very fast.i just feel like yesterday was the first day i make my first step to uniten with the gemuruh jiwa song terngiang ngiang in my ear.how come time pass really fast.haiyo can the time freeze atleast for a month and let me take a very deep breathe. please.right now i feel very stress.i have to study hard.gpa must atleast 3 and the above.haha.i lower-kan my target already.

ok la go study la me.

*end*

blek :P

dear bloggie,,

this week, i skipped class for two days because im sick.so i went back to uniten on tuesday night.so i went to class on wednesday as usual.after class i went to library at 2 with ning they all.so study physics together with ning and narin then around 4 ning went to physics tutorial and i skipped that class because narin influenced me.HAHA.but i dont know why nowadays i feel like kind of lazy want to go physics tutorial.last time i would be like very bersemangat sampai sangat membara to go for physics tutorial walaupun dah tidur nyenyak for 3 hours.but now i feel the class very sienz already.last thursday i also skipped that class just to hang with subulee at foodcourt.then went home got nothing much happen.

then on thursday also got nothing much happen.just go physics and calculus class.english class is canceled.then waited for subulee at itms then meeet her around 1.30 at coe foodcourt.that thurs we went back early.got no more crapping day like our old tradition already. :(

then on fri morning i went back to uniten because already planned with subulee to go midv together after she finished her campus survival thingy and i tagged along with her because im like so boring sit at hostel.quite fun also lor while doing the campus survival thingy.but i feel useless because other if group member like bersemangat follow them do their campus survivval thingy and with my group member i didn't like contribute anything.so finished all the job at 3 something like that.so went to midv around 5 like that after finished bathing and all.sonny like so kesian.when we about to go, i called him and asked him to get ready.then he asked can for him to bath first? then i said we want to go already la.then we when we reached amanah, sonny havent come down yet.he is like late for about 10 minutes like that.suddenly saw him running.he so kesian. he go and like mandi kerbau and quickly get ready.so reached midv at 6.then we split up with the guys la.takkan they want to tagged along with us to shop.then we went to many shops.at that moment im not really into seeing clothes because i just want to find my baggie.i feel so regret for not buying the dress i saw from treats.its rm89.90 and got 50%. feel so regret.hope when this thurs going again the dresss and discount still got.so didnt buy patrick birthday present because we were like so rushed and cannot think of what to buy for him.so we shopped till 10 and we didnt take our dinner.feel like time passed really fast.we weven shopped till dont feel hungry.HAHA.GILER LA.FIRST TIME I FORGET TO EAT.note these words.so we like bought a few currypuff and ate at big apple donut place there while waiting for the donuts.like so pity.HAHA.can u remember it subulee ?HAHA.then we like cheat the guys that we had our dinner.hey, we also forget to camwhored ! haiya ! its like a tradition already to camwhore when going out.dont know how come can forget about it.so reached uniten at around 11 something then follow sulee go dont know what place that mummy and papa asked to fetch.then reached home around 12 like that lor.so its quite fun going out with them.but very rushed la.i just bought a blue navy shoes and a black bag from vincci.im like peminat setia vincci.see i bought almost all my shoes from vincci.like out of 9 pairs of shoes, 6 pairs are from vincci.i also bought my sunnies and my baggie from vincci. (wink wink)HAHA.stupid la me.but still im peminat setia vincci. :)

ok la.gtg.plan to blog one whole morning wan today but cannot because everyone want to use the internet.ok la papa waited for so long already to use internet.

bye.

*end*

fake wide grin

dear bloggie,,

tonight i have to go back to uniten.i feel like kind of reluctant to go back to uniten.i dont know why.ala.who wont feel that way la.got classes and yuckee food.HAHA.then have to walk under hot sun and im still not 100 % recover.then there is physics lab also tomorrow.*big sigh*

so, i have been sick for the past four days like that.since last friday afternoon.i thought i will get well soon like at night or the next morning.then mana tahu my sick get even worse on sunday.then went to see doctor on sunday evening because i want to get mc if not i wouldnt bother pun want to go see doctor.then the doctor checked my body temperature is 38.9 celcius.like walao.so high le.i was like so suprised because i didnt shiver and some more i didnt la like feel that sick.then the doctor checked my throat then he said my throat very swollen.im like huhh.i dont feel pain also.then the doctor like so mengada said u will later.but until now i didnt feel any pain also.then the doctor want to put something disgusting to my throat.its like iodine like that.he like asked me to ahhh opened my mouth.then im like do my very irritating disgusted face said 'yerr, whats that i dont want'.then the doctor like very irriatted with me asked 'u sure r u dont want' and then throw the digusting thing away.so i only get mc for two days.mummy tried to ask for three days but the doctor is like so bloody mengada said cannot.he said if i havent still recover in these two days then i have to come back and do h1n1 test and he will give extra mc.stupid la.somemore ask people to do h1n1 test.

so i have physics test on this coming thursday.i havent really study yet.u know la when your brain dah kena drug its like very hard want to stay awake and be sober.how want to read all those craps and interpret in my damn bloody brain.so i have to study pyhsic later.

everyone in the house already kena jangkit by me except for mummy and papa.i dont know la whether kena jangkit by me or they memang about to get sick.and i also wonder how on earth i get sick at the first place.i also dont know how.

ok la.actually i dont know what am i doing here.right now my brain feel like kind of drousy.i dont know what am i crapping but i just simply crap because i feel that i need to update my blog.

ok bye.

*end*

nervous breakdown

dear bloggie,,

i need some new excitement in my life !

im so bored with the same old life and routines and whatever la.i need some kind of inspiration to boost up my semangat.

i dont talk much and seldom express how i feel and what am i thinking like how i used to.

i need a break for a while.

i dont know what is it but i felt like everything suddenly come rushing to me like a tsunami .i feel so stress for no good reasons.even now im also stress because i dont know what am i crappng.i felt that i hardly could talk about anything to people surrounding me.i felt that i hide too much emotions in myself and its going to explode any moment.i felt like shouting ! i dont know why .

i dont even think that there is anyone gonna understand what the hell am i posting here because i also could not understand what am i trying to say.and i also dont know why am bother to tell this in this blog.i have my own private blog la.shit.i revealed too much about myself.

i think im going to have nervous breakdown.

bye.

*end*

i choose blogging over studying.

dear bloggie,,

today i didnt start study anything yet.i just finish watching the clique.i dont know why suddenly i felt like watching that movie.its like typical teen's movie la.but quite nice lor.so long didnt like watch all these kind of movie.so after watching muvee, i started to online.and i like video calling with pui and po but cannot hear them well.so, i just end the call.

right now,im like so not in the mood of doing anything again tonight because tonight is another one hot bladdy night.im so sweaty right now and i already turn the fan speed to 5 already.but still didnt get any cooler.

everyone in the house went to bed early.i dont know why.even big sis stop onlining and went to sleep.normally she will online till like pagipagibuta only sleep.so giving me the oppurturnity to use the internet.

what i did today was i help mummy to clean the kitchen.her kitchen is like so disgusting.ewww.it took me almost three hours to cleaned the kitchen.after cleaning the kitchen, i went to nap and woke up at 7 like that.when i was napping, i dreamt something weird.i dreamt that someone left me a message at msn but i cannot see what was it about.then after woke up,im like so blur quickly go and the computer to see whether its true or not.then actually got nothing pun.yea i know im stupid.

currently, im like opening my room window so wide to let the cool air in.then suddenly i heard lots of creepy kind of noises.it sounds like someone tengah tanam mayat like that.then when i try to see whats happening, i didnt see anything and hear any noises.but then suddenly, got someone throw a stone and hit the wall.im like so fucking scared right now quickly go and close the window.i dont whether this is my feeling only or what but im so bloody fucking scared right now.

i really not in the mood of doing anything.i think i wana start study physics la.

bye.

*end*

setting a new revolution for myself

dear bloggie,,

since tonight im not in the mood of doing anything so lets stay up late and crap about everything that i want till im out of my breath for typing so long.

ok.i just finish stalking that someone from internet.HAHA.yea i know i sound like a psychotic biatch stalker bahaya tahap maksimum.i dont know why is this someone bother me so much.it take most of my time thinking of this someone, wondering where is this someone, what is this someone doing, who is this someone with now and etc.stupid la me.i hate all these kind of jiwang jiwang feeling.i dont like feeling like this.so not nice wan this feeling.what i got in the end.nothing right.then why dont stop thinking about that someone and i dont know why is it hard to stop thinking what we dont want to think and let the thing get over us.why why why huhh?.i really hate how the way brain think and how the heart feels work.i dont understand how they work together because when my brain like send impulses to my heart to stop thinking about that someone, my heart didnt seems to get it.haiyo.i so hate this feeling.

stop talking about this la.its so not helping also.crap about other thing to distratct my attention from this someone.

ok.so i have found my new interest in music.currently, im like really into electro pop.so, i really like yelle,a french singer and lovers electric.their songs are like very cool and nice.for me la.maybe for some other people yang tak tahu menghayati dont seems to know how to hayati their musics.but i dont understand anything that yelle is singing because its in french but fuck la.her songs are nice.

so, i feel like cutting my hair again.i wana cut my behind short and keep my front long.but there is no people wana fetch me out to cut.im like so irritated la.i wana cut hair only mah, like that also like so hard.so i dont know whether i will get my haircut or not.

i wana start a new revolution for myself.and only i included in my own revolution that is changing myself to a person that im proud to be.there are alot if negativity in myself that i have to shuuu it from myself

firstly, no more bitching and crashing about other people behind people back.
i think i like to bitch and crash people behind their back so very much.i dont know why.but this kind of attitude seems like sudah sebati with my blood already.i shall stop bitching about other people.i dont understand why do i enjoy bitching about other people especially about the people who do no bad to me.i wonder why?if they like do bad to me nak bitch pun bitch la in front of those people.dont la be like so bitchy always bitch about people this and that.and i also dont know why i always bitch about people bad.if people good didnt la pula see me puji puji them sampai nak mati.but if bitch about people bad, bitch sampai the throat kering also never mind.bukannya i get any good from all these what.so stop being a bitch and stop bitching about the others la.what if other people bitch behind my back.angry kan?i rather if the people bitch in front of me.so kalau nak bitch about other people bitch la in front the people and only if the person had do something bad to me.

second, judging people too much.ohh.i think i always judge the people around me 24/7.i never seems to stop judging other people.i dont know why on earth i like to judge people so much.is it because i always think that im better than any person on this earth.i really dont know why but mummy said its because that im too proud of myself and always think that im better than any person on this earth.maybe its true.i always judge how the way people talk to me, their action, personality and everything.then when i judge people, whatever they do or talk make me feel so disturbed and annoyed.if la i dont judge people maybe i will hate people less.because it always seems that i dislike people.i remember telling po that i dislike this person i dislike that person.then she asked me how come u always dont like people wan.HAHA.and i have a very bloody long list names of people that i hate and hating or disliking someone is not a nice feeling because i dont know why.its like when i always have to meet someone i dislike in my life every single day like very i dont know.so why dont i try to like them and stop judging them by their action or whatever.i even sometime let the people that i hate or dislike spoil my day.so maybe less judging people, hating people and disliking people will make my life easier, healthier and happier.

thirdly, i care too much about what people think about me.why on earth la that i bother so much about what people think about me.i dont know why.sometimes i feel like so naked and exposed in front of other people.i feel like im being judge by the others and what if they know the bad that i have done before or all my dark secrets.padan muka lah.suka sangat judge other people now u know how it feels.but seriously, what people think bout me really bothers me.when i like slipped something stupid from my mouth while talking to other people i will like think ohmygosh, now the person must be thinking that im a moron.its not nice thinking like that.always wonder what people will think of me.so starting for now, i will do whatever i want without thinking what people say or think about me.if the people rub it to my face i will just say fuck off la.suke hati orang la.sibuk!

forth, im so selfish.yea im the most self-centered biatch that u ever seen before.seriously i think im so self-centered and always dont bother to care about how the others feel.i always force people into doing something they dont want for my own good sake.i have to learn to be more self less la.but i really dont know how.i shall be more sensitive towards other people feelings and care about my loved more instead of habiskan my life thinking of that someone who i just met.i must be more willing to share my everything and help the others when the others need my help.dont be like errr.this got nothing to do with me so i dont give a damn.

fifth, im a very hot temper biatch.i always scold people for no reason out of sudden.especially when im pms-ing.i always shout at my loved one and make them feel hurts whenever i feel so angry even is not their damn bladdy fault pun.

sixth, showing off.yea i like to show off and i dont know why.maybe because it makes me feel good.i shall learn to be humble.sometimes i feel so jealous with the people that is humble like meiyi.how she be like so down to earth.i really try my very best to be like that but i dont know why somehow my ego dont let me to do that.its like if i got something good show la.not that salah pun.i really wana to be humble.i dont like showing off.

seventh, stop jealousing of the others and start being grateful with everything that i have.i shall stop jealous with other people's life or goods or whatever.if im like so jealous of them why dont i concentrate to be like better than them instead of jealousing them and then go and bitch behind them.yea i shall do like that.

ok.i cant think of any already.hope what i crap just now is what i will do and become in my future life.

ok im feeling sleepy already.

bye.

*end*

what a bloody fucking hot night is tonight

dear bloggie,,

tonight is so bloody fucking hot la.i really cannot stand and about to chop someone head off.arrghhhhh.this hot night really make me lose my temper.this stupid bloody hot night also make me so frustrated with almost everything.

i was in the mood of studying physics just now till la suddenly i felt that tonight feel so hot.then i started to sweat padahal i just like taken my bath 30 minutes ago and turn the fan speed to 5 already.then i also started to feel headache and dizzy and frustrated because at the same time i was trying my very best to interpret what i had study in physics in my brain but my brain which is so frozen and hard like rock cannot absorb any craps that i was reading.so im so bloody frustrated and stop studying physics and start blogging here letting all out my frustrations before i go and chop someone head.

besides that, i plan to have a very long conversation with subulee by videocall.somehow, i dont know what is the damn problem i cannot listen to her well.her voices seems to cut cut and cannot be heard clearly so i feel so frustrated and hot at the same time so i give up talking to her.

haiyo. why everything i do tonight seems like so tak menjadi.it seems like there's some bad aura around me making havoc on everything that i wana do.HAHA.STUPID THINKING..

haiyo.this hot night really getting on my nerve and started to disturb my inner peace already la.i really feel so frustrated and i felt like sleeping in the car and on the aircond to the minimum temperature and die freezing in the car.

so, i just a grab a bottle of ostrich egg like chocolate form the fridge and eat it to released my tension.now i dont care how many kg am i going to gain after tonight because i so bloody fucking frustrated till i dont give a damn about anything.

so it doesnt scared me shitlessly.

now im out of idea to crap.i've never run out of idea to crap.oh.i hate this wheather so very much!

*end*

whataniceday to blog (part 5)

dear bloggie,,

i had finish study physics chapter 1 only.when im about to start studying chapter 2 i suddenly get a sudden headache.then i try to online for a while.then after that i didnt stop onlining and continue study physics back.i think i should not blogging anymore as blogging will occupy most of my time.this is because when i start blogging i will blog more and more and eventually i end up blogging the whole day instead of studying.but i love blogging.i like expressing my ideas and thinking and feelings instead of studying.HAHA.

sometime i think i should take a course that have something to do with writing expressing ideas, views or whatsoever.but mummy will not approved me taking all these kind of course.she wants me to be a nerd that involve with science and be an engineer that earned probably 100 k a year.but i also like this civil course just that i seriously hate to study physics and calculus la.why is it calculus like way more hard than add maths.

today meiyi asked me why do i create a private blog if i doesnt want people to read it.then i asked her back why do people write on a diary if they dont want other people to read it.stupid question la.her question doesnt make sense at all.

so maybe next week i will be having physics test 1 and calculus quiz.haih.i feel so fann la.i really very lazy want to study la.but lucky i suddenly realized that i have physics test and calculus quiz now and not at the last minutes.if not later maybe i wont have the time to study lor.

i think i shall stop blogging for a while.then i must jauhkan diri from the internet connection.haih.i suddenly miss studying at hostel la.if study at home, i always feel so lazy and sleepy so fast.

i feel like the time is ticking so fast la.my brain like cannot even interpret what day is today.i really feel like yesterday was spm result day.i really missed my holiday where i always lie down on the bed, woke up from sleep straight away online, eat then sleep back.so relax and not pressuring.i wish i can have that holiday back.i cant wait for sem break.but then when sem break over its sem 2 already.and everyone keep on say that sem 2 is the hardest of all.i hear also feel like so lemah semangat and feel giving up already.

so i should stop onlining and continue studying.somehow, i thank god that the internet connection at uniten is slow.if not i will always blog and dont bother to study.

can i stop crapping about blogging and studying.no.so whatever la.

bye.

ps : subulee, see i blog so much today.its because u ask me so lor.

*end*

whatanicedaytoblog (part 4)

dear bloggie,,

now suddenly im like kind of emo already.i suddenly started to miss everyone that is not in my life right now.i hate the feeling of missing someone because when we miss someone and there is nothing that we can do about it.so i dont like missing people.and there is also a kind of empty feeling in my heart.

first, i miss all my patpo's.
second, i miss enen so very much.
third, i miss that someone and that someone would not know it and doesnt bother pun.
forth, i miss everyone at high school.

so what can i do about it when im missing all these people in my life? i dont know.i really dont know beside thinking about them and cry.

i seriously hate this feeling la.i suddenly feel that i started to lose everyone that is important to me in my life.they are like no more longer spending lots of time with me and they have new people in their life.they have their own new life and im not in it.im not included in their new life.im no more longer in their life.no more the person they will gonna hang out with.we only can meet like once in a month.and then when meet already, there is nothing to be say because we are no more longer in the same life or world.then we will stop talking and hanging out with each other because there is nothing to be say.or maybe when we hang out together we will try to show off who life is more fun, happy or cooler.then we will also lost the chemistry that we used to have.then i also will no more longer to be the first person to tell or kecoh with when there is like anything or some whatever thing happen in their life because there is someone new in their life to takeover my place already.they maybe dont bother much to tell me also.how's that feels if u are in my position?

i also like kind of occupied by new people in my life and i scared the emptiness that i felt because of missing them will be like diisi by other people then i would like lost connection with everyone in my past life and started to spend my life with the new people in my life only and forget about everyone in my past life.get what am i trying to say?

so to anyone who is concern out there, i just wana let u guys know that i miss u so much no matter what and u guys will always have a place in my heart.i hope u guys feel the same like how i feel.

*end*

whatanicedaytoblog (part3)

dear bloggie,,

i so miss vivian lap xuan en like hell.i wish that she is here with me now.i want her here more than everything else.seriously, i really miss her.whenever i listen to cuppycake song or watch high five in the early of morning i would think of her.and suddenly my heart will feel pain because i really miss her like hell.i really wish that she is here la.i so miss her.i hope that she know i miss her like hell and she feels the same too.i wonder how is she now?i didnt see her like for ages already.almost 3 weeks i think.i so miss her and i feel like hugging her, pinching her cheek playing with her whatever we always used to play together.

i love u enen.

*end*

whatanicedaytoblog(part 2)

dear bloggie,,

okay.so today i had make a pack to myself that i will start study today.i shall start on physics because after holiday there might be physics test 1.but i feel so bloody lazy la want to start study.i feel like blogging and crap the hell out of me.at the same time there is a guilt in my heart calling me go to study.but im really really not in the mood to study la.maybe once i open the book, i will start study.but the internet is so distracting la.plus, i will got 24 hours access to the internet today and tomorrow because big sis is staying over at MC's house (wink).i think i shall not waste mummy and papa's money by studying.i feel like quit studying and be a sampah masyarakat by just sitting at home only lying down on my bed and blogging and hope the money that i get form nuffnang can sara my life.

i need some kind of inspiration to boost up my semangat to study.ok la actually i found one.that is yesterday i saw big sis result slip of her overall result.i see her gpa like quite high.like all is 3.5 and above.i shall become like her also but her course is bussiness, marketing and research .easier then engineering what.HAHA.so bad wan me.but still, her result is also good what.if i so clever try beat her result la.stupid.

then besides that, during big sis convo day, there is a handicap guy on his wheel chair went up to take his scroll and he is an engineering student.that make me somemore inspire.if he doesnt give up with the difficulties that he might having while studying then why i, a very healthy fat biatch should give up la.there is no reason for me to give up la.

i also have to remember back all my aims before coming to uniten that i had set already.dont be such a loser and quiter can or not.pandai cakap kena lah pandai buat.stop sleeping during calculus class already la.stop concentrating too much on sleeping and eating la.all these do no good to me.i think i should do a routine timetable for myself la.do already also doesnt mean will follow wan mah.haih.stupid la me.someone please force me to study !

so shall i start study right now ? .maybe later la.after i finish blog whatever stuff i want.then i will start study soon.i will, seriously.

*end*

whatanicedaytoblog(part 1)

dear bloggie,,

sorry i started to like neglect u because right now im like to busy blogging at my private blog no matter whether its private or or not private stuff.

but suddenly its start to become like a habit to blog at my private blog every night before i go to sleep.like telling the blog what did i do the whole day something like that.and i also like blog about something sweet that i dont want to share with other people.HAHA.

ok.so today i will blog lots lots of craps today because today is a nice day to blog.

yesterday i went to mcD to meet po, pohteng and kuanmay.i didnt realized before that i miss them so very much till i see them yesterday.its like im almost cry when seeing them and i cant stop smiling.seriously, i have no idea that i miss them so very much.oh shit.i forgot to hug them la.because when going back i was like suddenly in a rush.mummy like suddenly calling me and ask me where are u in a very aggresive way.so im also like very panicked faster go back and just like said ok bye like that.i should appreciate that moment, i dont know when only will i meet them again.so regret.i also didnt take much picture with them,just only a pic that is a pic of me and po only.haihh.i started to miss them already.i also missed pui and wong so very much.i miss fooling around with them.ohmygosh, i so FUCKING miss them la.wish that they were at mcD also yesterday.what we do most was chatting lor.then while we were chatting i suddenly saw something inappropriate.18pl scene.haha.im legal to see already la.a yuhua guy who look very innocent who is a prefect started to put his hand on his GF's boob and start grabbing it.im like ohmygosh ohmygosh, and laugh like hell and tell po, they all.they were like so calm and buat tak tahu only not like me so hyperactive.HAHA.then the guy saw me but he like didnt bother much that im looking because he like getting high already.i feel like im watching a live porn show.and his GF was doing homework at that moment.everyone at mcD saw what had happened already and everyone like started to stare at their place and the guy like stop doing it already.yala, takkan dont want to stop right dah everyone looking at them.ohmygosh.really tak sangka la.the guy look like a very nerdy but tak sangka he is like so bernafsu gila babi sial nak mampus.i bet that he already poke his GF pantat already.HAHA.

anyway, hope to see all of my patpo's again.

so after went to mcD, mummy brought to mines.went there with mummy and big sis.mummy like bring me there to shop because she doesnt want me to go out on thurs with friends to shop.im like huhh, whats the differences la.so went to kitschen,F.O.S, and niichi.that day i like saw lots of thing that i like suddenly when i went there yesterday like got nothing to buy.so shop for about 2 hours like that only get to buy a shirt.i feel so frustrated because didnt get to buy much thing or see something that i like.for the first time, i feel shopping is so frustrating.suddenly i feel regret for not buying the boho dress la.i suppose to buy it but mummy like so not willing to buy because she said that its not worth it.but if i insist i sure will get to buy the dress wan.HAIHH.

so after that went to eat dinner then take away some food for meiyi,small sis and papa.

end of the story for what i did yesterday.

*end*

hectic week

dear bloggie,,

last week was really a hectic week.lots of things happen and my brain can like have a sec to interpret whats happening surrounding me.mon got nothing much.

then, we have our first official calculus test on tues.im like so very scared and thank god the test was only on chapter 1.if the chapter 2 is coming out i will be like so dead because i didnt study much on chapter 2 and chapter 2 is so hard like hell and i dont understand a single word in the calculus book crapping about chapter 2.during the test i was like so blurrred.i was waiting outside the exam hall wit other students.then suddenly i feel so hot and my brains was so heavy and all the noises that i heard from my surrounding make my brain pain.then i tried to find my inner peace but cannot.then suddenly dont know around what time, we all enter the exam hall and i quickly find my table.my table was c140.when i first saw the question people i was like so blanked.suddenly everything that i had study have been like wiped off from my brain.seriously, i was like very very so blanked.then when i start doing the first question which was quite easy, i suddenly like forget how to do.the question is only about inequality la.im like is it like this or like that.i really feel so blanked and dumb.then suddenly there is a guy beside me giving me signal.i thought what the hell, u wana to tiru me.im like so scared because there is like the pengawas peperiksaan walking here and there.later they will like accuse me of berpakat with him.my heart like beat so fast at that moment but actually the guy just want to borrow my rubber la.stupid me.so i do do do do the question without knowing am i doing it correct or what.the when the clock tick like 10, i went out from the hall and find subulee.that night we went to jusco balakong to buy starbucks drink.then i feel back to normal already after sipping chocolate cream chip.so went back to hostel before curfew over.at that moment i feel so released and relaxed already.like there is 1111 paun of stone that had been put on my shoulder suddenly is taken away already that kind of feeling.haha.but still the next day have to continue class like normal.

on wednesday, i feel so sleepy.i feel like sleeping the whole day.even physics lab im like so sleepy.im like suppose to bekerjasama with my group member to finish up the report but i just lay down there on a table and didnt bother to care much about what happen.at that time, i just feel like going home to sleep.then at night got lots of agm meeting need to go.eventually we end up going to swimming club agm meeting and i dont know why suddenly on earth im the member representative.the meeting over at around 10 like that.after that meeting went home.suddenly around 11 something kishen called to ajak us go out to yamcha.then he said must bring fui ling.at that moment subulee and i dont feel like going because its already late and we scared that we will miss our curfew.then we like try to give excuse said fuiling is not going to kishen but kishen said never mind must come also so we went lor.that night was a crazy night.we went back to the hostel at 5 in the morning because had to wait for the curfew to over.then we went to putrajaya and lepak and i dont understand how come the guys are like so beria -ria drive here and there to find nice view to lepak.they said by lepak-ing like that they can find their inner peace.HAHA.so went there then camwhore abit then went to mcd bangi to wait for the curfew to over.it was a fun night la but yet tiring.feel so sleepy.lucky the next day i have only one hour class.

some pics that we took at putrajaya.

hehe.everyone is so possy.

narin,me,kishen,sugan,tevan and sukh.

photographed by subulee.

doing some break dance i think.

the five monkeys.

me and subulee

photographed by me

everyone is like busy seeing the view while subulee and tevan camwhore

seriously they are really pee-ing

yea, i know it looks disgusting

me,subulee,kishen,narin

=_=

on thurs, i had only an hour class that is physic.calculus and bi classes canceled.so after physics class i faster ran home and sleep lor.then while i was sleeping, suddenly ling ling came back said all the students need to go to dss to hear some announcements.i was sleeping at that moment didnt bother want to go so only ning and ling went.suddenly around 1 like that subulee called me and tell me that uniten is closed for 10 days because of h1n1.then i was like so blurr need to interpret what she had said in my brain a few times.then when i get what she said im like so happy.got no class for 10 days.but too bad, there are 3 people confirmed with h1n1 and 6 are suspected.i feel like kind of bad having fun pleasure while the other 9 people are suffering.

after that we went to mines around 6 like that.subulee went home and drive her back to uniten and drive us to mines.i didnt like go to mines like since forever and now that place got lots of new shops already.there also got kitschen and nichii.now, im like so into these two shops only.i dont know why.so ate dinner at old town kopitiam because there go no other nice place to eat.after that straight went back to hostel.around 9 like that papa and mummy come and fetch me home.

friday did nothing much.

saturday was big sis convocation day.a very historic day for the Lim's family. :)

sunday we went to mmu cyberjaya to take family picture then went to visit my sick grandma at segambut.

thats all for the whole last week.lots of things happen right.

*end*

green camp : ) (a good deed towards the earth)

dear bloggie,,

on date 31st july till 2nd of august i joined the green camp organized by ice club.ice is institution of civil engineer club.izzati thought that ice club is an ice sculpture club.HAHA.

the camp was quite fun but at the same time feel boring because got not much outdoor activities..most of the activities were presentation about environment.there were only four outdoor activities like cleaning the Klang river, barbeque, moonlight walk and wild run.the activity that was the most fun and memorable is wild run. we were running like hell and then during the activity suddenly rained.so we all soaked in wet and run like crazy peoples.HAHA.

my group is Autumn and my group members are shaq, muhsen, orence, rifdy, win loong, yee teng, raja and hussein.my group facillitator were ah liang and hazzian.

im like not very ngam with my group member and i also think they like very irritated with me.HAHA.yea seriously i think they are.because whenever there is a presentation then i will like so excited gila like kena sawan babi like that then like telling it very fast in like a second then everyone like doesnt understand a word that im saying.then they will like ignore my idea and start thinking a new idea then im like will pertahankan my idea like that and make them feel annoyed.

we stayed in a chalet during the camp.the chalet is nice but it is dirty especially the toilet.during the camp im like scared to drink lots of water and eat lots of food because i dont want to go to the toilet to shit and pee.i also like dont want to bath much and if can i dont want to bath at all.HAHA.the toilet is seriously so disgusting.thinking back about it making me feel like vomiting.im like so glad when the camp is like over already because i dont need to enter the toilet anymore.

i wonder why was the ice commitee members always like to take picture so much.they like always take lots of pictures no matter what.like the time we were about to sit a boat at klang river, they will like make sure there is a camera man on the boat.like even during wild run, the ah liang like so rajin want to take picture.like even its rain and everyone was running, he will still bother to take out his camera and take video or take pictures.then im like a very bitchy like that said, 'haiyo dont take my pictures la.'he sure think why am i like so mengada.HAHA.

overall, i glad to join the camp but after this exprience i dont think i want to go camping anymore.i cant stand the dirtiness of camping.HAHA.i dont know since when im like got phobia of bacteria.like seriously whenever i touch something dirty i would like start thinking that the bacteria is entering my skin and membiak under my skin.so now before going camping i will think twice.

so we went back to uniten at around 12 like that then reached uniten around 1.after that went home, bathed washed clothes then went to pc fair with subulee and her mom.i didnt buy anything much just bought two earphone.i dont know why i buy two earphone maybe because its cheap.then when going home we pass by all those internet booth.there was digi guy asking us to sign up with them and they like dont want to let us go so we have to layan them la.then suddenly there was girl from maxis booth like rampas pelangan then suddenly they were like start arguing.i think i want to get the celcom broadband because uniten internet connection was so FUCKING slow and i also can bring it back home to use since i alwasy cannot get to use the internet at home.but somehow, i didnt sign up for celcom broadband and the offer is rm5o for a month and there is no contract.and i feel so regret.

some pics during the camp.

group picture during the last day

me and liang

while moon light walking

i cant remember when we took this pic

i cant remember this also

during group presentation

before group presentation.

gambar curi

during presentation

smile.

this is also another gambar curi.yea liang memang suka curi curi take people picture wan.

i copy all these pics from ah liang fb.HAHA.

*end*

dear bloggie,,

currently, im too busy with my own private blog.so im like didnt bother much to update nowadays but i will soon.

got lots of things happen lately.

will update soon.